The Burden of the King
by TolkienGeek1
Summary: Thorin is struck hard by the guilt of all that has happened in his families history, and Brynn finds him in a dark place. He believes he deserves this pain, but Brynn knows it's time for him to let it go. One shot! :)


**Surprise! I wrote a new one shot! It's been awhile, but I've had some projects on the go! Mainly, editing my older works. Honestly, I've grown a lot as a writer since I started on this website (and still have a lot of growing to do!) and it physically hurts me to read my very first writing! I like to go back and read my stories to get into writing about this family, and I couldn't bring myself to read those early ones. And I didn't like that. SO I decided to do something about it! If you'd like to check out what I've rewritten, there's a list in my bio! I didn't want to bog this one shot AN even more.**

 **This is just a little one shot to get back in the game, but I know you guys seem to like Thorin and Brynn's relationship so I decided to write this for you all!**

 **Enjoy!**

 **(Brynn - my OC from my quest story and the little sister of Fili and Kili - is 19 in this)**

It wasn't often that someone didn't know where Thorin was. He was the king – he wasn't exactly inconspicuous. And usually, when he was going somewhere, he told his family. Or at least his servants. So when Brynn could not find Thorin or anyone who had seen him, she worried. She liked to believe she was the calm, level headed one. Worrying was for Fili, Kili, and Thorin. _She_ took after her mother, who didn't worry until she had to. But the truth was, Brynn was more in between. Especially, it seemed, when it came to Thorin. It might seem odd, but the man took care of everyone else – _someone_ had to worry about him. And Brynn took that job upon herself.

She searched for Thorin everywhere. Hours she was out, and just at the brink of finding Fili and Kili and getting them to help her (because this was not like Thorin and their family had such a knack for finding trouble that this really, really was starting to worry her) when she brought herself to check the last place she hadn't looked, and the one she desperately hoped Thorin was not in. If he was there, she had a feeling she really did have a reason to worry.

He was there, and her heart fell.

Brynn crept up behind Thorin. He knelt in the dark, in front of the empty tomb that was honouring all those who had died in Smaug's attack and hadn't gotten a proper burial. Torchlight illuminated the plaque and all the names, and backlit Thorin.

"Uncle?" Brynn called, circling around so she could see his front.

Thorin's head was bowed, and he did not look at her. She had seen that type of avoidance before. He didn't want her to see him with whatever emotion he was now experiencing. He didn't want to appear weak. Brynn didn't know how she could ever convince him that she did not look up to him because he never felt, but because he had felt such horror and still somehow lived.

Brynn went nearer and placed her hand on Thorin's shoulder. He shook beneath her, imperceptibly to the eye, but she felt it.

"Uncle, please, speak."

"I am alright, Brynn. Leave me."

Oh, but Mahal, she could not leave him. He didn't want her to know what was troubling him, but she wasn't a dwarfling anymore. He didn't have to hide from her.

"I won't leave." Brynn whispered. "Not now. Not ever."

Thorin looked up at her, and his eyes broke Brynn's heart cleanly in two. Whatever burden was on his mind was weighing him down until he fell under the pressure. And a fallen king, Brynn thought, needed his niece.

"Sit with me, Brynn." Thorin said, not in any sort of commanding voice, but merely a request.

Brynn knelt beside her uncle, mirroring his posture to see what he saw. She stared up at the wall of silver that covered the rock closing off the tomb. Engraved in it were all the names of those who had died. Brynn wondered what Thorin was thinking. She had a fairly good idea – you didn't grow up being almost raised by a man and not come to know his mind – but somehow she didn't think she knew the depths of it.

"My family killed them." Thorin spoke and Brynn started to reply, but he put a hand on her knee, anticipating her instant reaction to deny it. "Not your mother or Uncle Frerin, but me, my father, and grandfather."

"Uncle-"

"Peace, Brynn." Thorin hushed her, a joyless smile barely lifting his lips. She was as fiery as her mother. "We brought the dragon here. The carnage that day cannot be forgotten."

"Uncle-"

Thorin sighed. "Brynn-"

Brynn grabbed Thorin's hand off her knee, no longer content to let him keep her silent. " _No. Listen_ to me. You are putting blame on yourself that is unwarranted. You say mama is not to blame, but what did you do that she did not?"

"I should have talked sense into my grandfather long before the gold collected enough to entice Smaug to attack."

"And you will honestly tell me that mama was not capable of doing that as well?"

Thorin shook his head, and Brynn's jaw tightened. Their family hated to be talked out of guilt and it was oh so irritating.

"So many people died, Brynn." Thorin said, looking up at the silver plaque, it's shiny hue reflected in his watery eyes.

Brynn shifted into his line of sight. "So many people _lived._ And they lived because of you. You led them to safety, when Thrain and Thror were not there. How many more would have died if you had not been there? The people remember the dead out of honour and respect, they do not do it out of bitterness. I was not there when Smaug attacked – and if _you_ hadn't I probably wouldn't be around now, I may mention – but because I was not, the people like to tell me about it from their perspectives, as if I had never heard the tale before. They speak of the death, and the tragedy, but they speak of the hope as well. The hope that _you_ gave them. Not a single person has had anything but respect and gratitude for you. You did not take part in your fathers' sins – you redeemed them."

"They may have brought the dragon, but I woke it up. I set it on Laketown."

"And if you hadn't, Azog would have. The destruction wouldn't have stopped. They would have gone after all of Middle Earth. You _know_ they would have. If Smaug had never been defeated, we would still be suffering in the Blue Mountains, the Laketown people would be poor as dirt, living in those rickety wet shacks, and they'd be under the control of that greasy man, instead of Bard. People have died in the past, but you have freed up the future for life."

The pooled up tears in Thorin's eyes slipped down his cheeks. "I cannot bear this weight anymore." He took a shuddering breath.

"Then do not! Uncle, it is not yours to bear!" Brynn put Thorin's face between her hands, his watery eyes causing her to choke up as well. "It is time to leave this weight in the past, where it belongs. We must focus on the future, continuing to do well by our people _now._ Do you believe me?"

Thorin hesitated only a second before nodding. He leaned forward, and Brynn pulled him to her, trying to hold his large frame as tightly as she could with her smaller one. He wept on her shoulder, and she cried too, for the pain her uncle endured. He took far too much responsibility on himself and it hurt her to watch him whither.

"You are not alone in this, uncle. Fili, Kili, mama, and I stand beside your throne, but most importantly we stand beside _you._ In everything."

Brynn and Thorin did not move for a long time, and when Thorin finally sat up, he looked tired. Tired, but whole again. At least partially.

"I apologize, Brynn." He muttered, standing to his feet.

Brynn followed, brow furrowed. "Apologize for what?"

"I should not have put that on you."

Brynn's hands went to her hips. Now that Thorin seemed to be doing better, she was losing patience.

"Uncle, please, I am nineteen years old. I can handle it." She huffed. "I have just gotten you to drop a weight you have been carrying for far too long, don't pick up a new one!"

Thorin smiled and took her hand in his, leading her away from the memorial. "Yes, I do suppose you have grown right before my eyes."

Brynn nodded emphatically. "I am the same age Fili was when we came here. You can trust me with the same responsibility."

Thorin paused. "I have always trusted you, Brynn. Always."

They followed different paths, eventually popping out into the throne room, the large cavern filled with intertwining pathways. It was a breathtaking show of craftsmanship.

Thorin put his arm around Brynn's shoulders, taking in the sight. It never got old – especially for him. He had had to go so long without seeing it that he swore never to take it for granted.

"Beautiful." Brynn murmured, as in awe of it as her uncle.

"I am happy to share this view with you, love."

Brynn paused, thinking. She turned into Thorin, wrapping her arms around his waist. "Uncle, this is the product of our pasts. Everything that's happened, every hardship, has led us up to this moment. I'm not happy for the sorrow, but I'm glad they have taken us here."

Thorin held Brynn a little tighter. "You're right, Brynn."

Brynn grinned up at Thorin, her cheekiness shining through. She couldn't have it all serious. "Of course I am. I always am."

Thorin laughed, leading them down one of the pathways. "Is that right? What of the time you thought someone was stealing from our food stores?"

Brynn blushed, her smile disappearing. "I thought we agreed not to bring that up. It was an honest mistake."

"But you were wrong."

"Alright alright. I'm not always right." Brynn rolled her eyes. "A girl can try to be perfect."

"Oh, you are, Brynn. You're perfect just the way you are."

Brynn smiled, gripping her uncle's hand. They went home that day, cutting their political duties off to rest. Thorin needed it, and Brynn and her brothers and mother seized the opportunity for a break. They spent the remainder of the day together in their living room, talking of all the good things that had come into their lives, and just enjoying the time together.

Thorin visited the memorial again, but not to mourn. He went to honour the dead. He always remembered Brynn's words when he was there, as clear as when she had said them. Finally, he was free.

 **Oh my land it hurt my heart to write Thorin like this. But stories need to happen. And it turned out alright in the end! :)**

 **I hope you guys enjoyed this. As always, if you have a one shot request, send it my way! I love getting ideas from you.**

 **Please review if you have a minute!**


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